Nesting

Haven't had a lot of nesting instincts yet, which I think makes D a bit disappointed (was probably hoping I'd start to pull more weight around the house with the cleaning and purging of stuff).  I have lists going of things I want to do, but can't seem to muster up the energy most of the time.  Last Sunday, I was up early, don't think it was even 7 AM yet.  Let the dog out, got myself some water, then noticed the kitchen windows were dirty.  Pulled out the windex and cleaned the windows above the kitchen sink.  I even had to pull out a stool to clean the top pane.  If only the rest of my day had been as productive as those first few early morning minutes.

Release

I tried a new prenatal yoga video this morning.  A bit out of date--some of the women were wearing these funky full bodied leotards (sexy!).  A bit new agey--the instructor was wearing a turban (side note, I'm pretty sure we camped next to her at a music festival a number of years ago--they had parked their euro van over some ground nesting bees who didn't bother them the whole weekend).  It was a bit more active than other prenatal yoga videos I've tried or the class I attend now and then which isn't too bad except I was doing this in the morning before work and before breakfast.  In one part of the video while standing, you start moving your hips from side to side and then basically just let go and dance, swinging your arms or whatever feels good.  Not sure what was going on, but it was a huge release and I started crying.  Though I felt super weird just crying in my living room, it felt really good to let it all out.  A reminder to keep it loose and let go more often!

Sacred Vessel

A friend was telling D the other day how I'm a sacred vessel.  He was a bit confused at first.  :)  It's really weird when I think about my body being used to create another human, part D, part me.  I remember a friend of a friend telling me she did not enjoy being pregnant, that it just felt way too alien to have this being inside of her.  But I think it's quite amazing that such a complex individual will be the outcome of what started as a ball of cells!  All I can really picture right now is the silhouette version of Baby Buddha from ultrasound pics.  Likely will have dark hair and brown eyes (dominant traits though there is blond hair/blue eyes in my extended fam).  I picture gangly arms and legs and super skinny now though according to the weekly update I receive, he's starting to gain more weight.

Getting a lot more comments at work of how I've suddenly popped.  It's true, I am much bigger these days and I'm feeling it.  And I still have 3-4 months to go!

My biggest complain is regarding sleep, or lack thereof.  I've been having bouts of insomnia, usually around 4 AM.  Most of the time I'm able to get back to sleep, but some nights I toss and turn until my alarm goes off.  Could I be overheated?  Is 5 hrs all my body needs right now?  Is this preparation of learning to get by on less sleep?  Could be my body has just had enough of sleeping on my left side.  Sleeping on your back or right side with a growing uterus can lead to compression of the inferior vena cava.  And just shifting positions with a huge belly is uncomfortable and will wake me up.

I know I'm bound to become more uncomfortable as I get bigger and the weather warms up.  I really try to keep my complaining to a minimum but lack of sleep and caffeine makes me a grumpy girl at times.  Next time I'm awake at 4 in the morning, I'll just have to get up and do something productive.  Anyone have any easy baby knitting projects?

Appreciating...

...being able to sleep in.  I enjoy my sleep and being able to laze about the house on weekend (or holiday) mornings.  Not getting as much sleep as I'd like is one of those selfish reasons I didn't want to have kids.

...my health.  Recovered from a nasty cold a month ago.  I don't remember a cold hitting me quite so hard.  Exhausted, sinus pressure, lots of congestion, bad cough, not able to sleep.  Being preggers meant I couldn't take my usual Alka Seltzer cold medicine which would have taken care of some of my symptoms and helped me sleep.  I got by on a dose of tylenol and sudafed here and there.  Thankful I didn't get Darren sick!

...Netflix.  I went through about a season and a half of Dexter while sick.  Probably a good thing there aren't any more seasons available on instant view.

2nd Trimester

• I've been able to borrow maternity clothing from my sis-in-law who is the same size as me and has great sense of style.  Maternity style has come a long way.  I swear I'm dressing more stylish while pregnant than I normally do.  Maybe this just means I need to work on my regular wardrobe once I can fit back into it.
• We're starting to accumulate baby stuff from friends who have had boys and aren't planning on future kiddos.  This has been awesome.  Also nice to be able to find out which things are necessary vs. what stuff we can hold off acquiring until we know we have more space and/or money.  We receive a used carseat (and yes, I do know there are now expiration dates on these things--I wonder if this is really for the infant's sake or the company's profits).
• We find out we’re having a boy!  Really cool to see him so active during ultrasounds.  Pretty weird that I can’t feel any of that movement yet.
• Around week 18, I realize I can feel him move around.  Felt like gas bubbles in the beginning, but eventually I realize, that’s my son in there!  Love this peculiar feeling.  He gets particularly active after I eat (especially something sweet) or when I 1^st lay down in bed.
• I drop in on some prenatal yoga classes.
• Haven't been having specific cravings except for caffeine which I've done a pretty good job of avoiding.  I used to be a big tea drinker and have found that non-caffeinated tea just doesn't cut it.  I do seem to be craving sweets after lunch & dinner.  Chocolate or ice cream seem to hit the spot when I do indulge.
• My belly button is slowly turning into an outie.  It's true what they say about the inside of a belly button feeling very soft.
• Have been working on turning our 2nd bedroom which was an office/storage space (crafty stuff, music equipment, old letter, photo albums, random junk...) into an office/nursery.  This means going through everything to decide what we really need to keep and what can be given away.  A desk and an empty dresser will stay.  Eventually add some wall shelving for office storage.  A bookshelf will stay for kids books & toys.  A TV armoire will move into the basement for storage.  A crib (currently in pieces) will be moving in.  Eventually will also have to tackle the closet which also was a collection space of shtuff.

1st Trimester

• Found out I was preggers at 6 weeks.  Initial reaction was a bit of freaking out and feeling overwhelmed.  I’ve always wanted kids, but never felt ready—but I tend to overanalyze decisions worrying about all the negative outcomes instead of focusing on the big picture.  Also, I’ve spent 35 years not being pregnant, and now all of a sudden, + sign.
• When I went in to the doctor’s office to confirm I was pregnant, I peed in a cup.  The lab tech called my number, proceeds to tell me the results were negative (ahh, that’s rather disappoin…)... I mean positive (umm, is it negative or positive???)... yes, positive.  Hands me the ‘you’re pregnant’ piece of paper that I’m supposed to give to my nurse.  Feeling super confident about this lab (I switch clinics).
• Morning sickness seemed to start as soon as I found out I was preggers.  Actually, I wouldn’t call what I had morning sickness, but general malaise and nausea.  Had a queasy stomach in the morning or late afternoon when feeling tired.  I didn’t have much of an appetite and lots of food or drink just didn’t sound or taste very good.  I didn’t want to be in the kitchen so D did a lot of the cooking and cleaning.
• I feel like I’m showing, but I’m not yet, that’s just belly fat.  :)
• I find out I have a large ovarian cyst.  Cysts are normal during regular ovulation and menstruation, but this cyst is large (~3 x 4.5 inches)) so we’ll have to keep an eye on it.
• We tell family and a few close friends about the news, but hold off telling most people because miscarriages are somewhat common in the 1st trimester.

Mrs

I got married about a week ago.  Strange that something it seems like I've been thinking about forever (not since I was a little girl forever, but longer than 2.5 years since Darren and I have been together for 10+ years) has finally happened.  Darren and I got engaged 2.5 years ago but the planning kept getting stalled.  I think I kept using Darren's lack of wanting to be super involved as a reason for me to keep holding off.  Or what we were each expecting just didn't mesh.  Or I wanted to make other people happy.  Ideas were thrown out there and there were certain ideas which stuck, but an actual date eluded us.

Then, I got pregnant.  I don't feel one must be married to have a kiddo, but I did want to be married, and wow, the pressure from my parentals increased big time.  At first, I was still resisting.  It would happen when it would happen.  The way we had been going, um, that hadn't really worked for us.  So yes, we were going to get married, now it was a matter of before or after.  Well, D's parents would be out of state for a couple months so it's either January or April.

I already had a dress.  I still fit into the dress at 3+ months preggo, but if we waited until D's parents returned, um, I would no longer be fitting into the dress.  This wasn't necessarily the perfect dress (I bought it on-line during one of J Crew's sales, thanks T!), but the dress wasn't a really big issue to me (remember, I did not have a dream wedding in mind).  It was a really beautiful classic style, it fit well enough, well at least it had ~2 years ago.  :)  I didn't want to have to buy another dress.

Okay then, lets have the wedding in January, there are a couple weekends we know all our family will be available.  Narrow that down to 1.  Oh, and let's invite some of our close friends.

Now, the ceremony.  It's cold and wet outside in January, should probably be done indoors for everyone's sake.  We have two friends who can officiate ceremonies.  If neither of them work out, we've got a back-up option.

Location.  Indoors, can accommodate a ceremony and dinner, or we have the ceremony at Darren's parent's house and find a place for dinner.  Right now it's about a week and a half from our chosen wedding date.  No pressure.  Ray's Boathouse was mentioned, but kinda shelved because they charge a big fee if you have the ceremony on-site.  I contacted a random Italian restaurant on the east side which would work if we end up having the ceremony at D's parents place.  I contact Snoqulimie Lodge because it would be a cool location and memorable.  One of their smaller rooms is available and they're willing to work with us.  We end up contacting Ray's as it's one of our favorite restaurants and much more us.  The location is available and they're willing to lower the ceremony fee since we're going super simple (I don't need an hour long rehearsal, aisle runner, bottle of champagne, etc).  Contract is signed 1 week before our wedding!

Now it's a matter of officially inviting our friends and family, officially asking our friend to officiate, and taking care of some other small details.

My lovely girl friends arranged mani/pedi's (HOA on Roosevelt has a group room) a couple nights before the wedding and for all of us to get our hair done (Gary Manuel Aveda Institute rocks!) the morning of the wedding.  If anyone needs their hair done for a special occasion the students do an awesome job for an amazing price!

The evening ended up being about as perfect as I could have hoped (will be a separate entry).  Now that we're officially Mr. and Mrs, all we need to worry about it planning a kick-ass party!  Can't wait.